I come from a pretty private family, and for a very long time, I was overall a private person. Sure, I'd share aspects of my life and seemed like a super social person. But, the truth was, I didn't think that if anyone knew the real me, the one on the inside that no one knew, no one would like me, including myself.
I go to an absolutely amazing church. If you have these paradigms about church being a boring and stiff place, you've never been to my church. Or, if you think church is filled with a bunch of perfect people who sit around gossiping and judging you all day long. You haven't been to my church.
If you live in the Phoenix metropolitan area (particularly the East Valley), just click on the "TVC" link in the upper portion of this blog for more information on trying my church out. No need to dress up. Crawl out of bed and come, even if you're stinkin' drunk. We don't care. We'll love on you.
The past 5 yrs as I've gotten more integrated into life groups, which is the heartbeat of our church. They are small groups that meet during the week in people's homes. Some are Bible studies, but it is more a time to be transparent, get to know other people, fellowship, eat, pray for each other. You've just gotta come and be a part of it to know what I'm talking about.
All those years I held everything so close to my heart, it was not just hurting me, but I was causing pain and hurt to other people because I didn't know how to deal with my crap, or that even some of it was pure crap to the nth degree.
There is this lie that if you're known, that no one will like you, or that you are beyond lovable. It's a complete lie of the enemy to get you to stay isolated and alone. This does not mean that you can share everything with everyone, as that's not wise, either.
However, there is this thing about being able to have others help you bear your burdens, to pray for you, to help you work things through or to walk with you, sometimes even carry you. No man is an island.
We may like to think we are all self-sufficient, but none of us are. Everyone has the desire to be loved and accepted by others. Some do this by pushing people away, by needing no one. That's so lonely and sad. We say we don't need anyone.
Then, sometimes just having people love you - that's scary. We are all broken people to some degree.
Let other people love on you, to accept you. You are not alone. You are safe with us. Come and see what we are about at the Tempe Vineyard.
It's taken me a long time to learn to be transparent. It is very freeing to not have to bottle all this stuff in. It is good to be loved, and I feel so incredibly loved.
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