Mon, 12-Dec-2011 ---- Storm, Let It Rain

Today began as every other day.  Nothing unusual other than it was raining.  It's been a bit rainy the past month or so here in central Arizona, which is unusual for this time of year.  Heavy rains bring torrential flash flooding, which can be deadly.  Yet, for the arid desert, it is most welcomed.  It doesn't pour here often, but it does happen.  Today it poured during various times of the day.

These clouds don't look so bad, but half hour later, there were no semblance of the blue hue, and the sky was once again covered with the gray and dreariness of the blanket of clouds that stretched as far as the eye could see.  Storms moved in quicker and it poured as my son and I raced to the car from the dr's office, hoping to not get soaked.  We didn't get soaked, but a little wet, as we welcomed the safety of our vehicle from the downpour.

Life is sort of like the weather today.  As the clouds throughout the day moved in and out of parts of where we lived, there were moments that looked very ominous and others maybe there was a ray of sunlight, of hope that things were clearing up.  And then, comes the storm again.

I once (okay, maybe it was more than once) told my kids when they were younger that the rain sometimes is God feeling sad that people on this earth do not love Him.  Okay, that wasn't true nor was is biblical.  I did tell them that later, and I'm not sure why I ever said that to them.  Maybe I thought it was funny or a mom's warped sense of humor.

Nonetheless, to some people, the rains are welcomed.  To others, it isn't.  The rains feed crops for the farmers, but too much rain isn't good, as is not enough rain.  Rains here in the valley help refresh the air and get rid of the pollution, at least temporarily.  Rains have served in the Bible as a form of discipline or punishment at times, and other times, the lack of it has had the same effect.

Today, my own tears showered my face as I think of some most recent happenings in my life.  Yesterday it was clear and sunny, which is a condition that I absolutely love here.  We have in central AZ so many clear & sunny days.  But, my 2011 has been filled with a lot of storm clouds that look very threatening.  I thought maybe there was a ray of hope in the past couple months, but those gray clouds always lingered right nearby.

And, thus today, so appropo that our weather is how I feel. 

Why some things happen?  Maybe I'll never know.  But, I am definitely sure that no matter what, God is good and He is good all the time.  Whether in feast or famine, God's grace is sufficient to weather any storm.  I've seen it over the past 7 yrs.

Reflecting on the past 12 months of 2011, I was hoping for 1 month where there would be no pain, no suffering, no heartache.  So, I'm 12/12 months of pain, suffering, heartache.  I don't rejoice in those things, rather I rejoice in what God is doing in me, changing and molding me to be more like Him.  I can't compare the things I'm going through to what Christ did on the Cross, but the events of my life do matter to Him, because He died for them.

After 7 yrs of hell on this earth, I still trust God.  In fact, it's a deeper trust that was born out of suffering.  I'm hoping that next year, 2012, will be the Year of Jubilee for me.  If not, God is still good and He is good all the time.

Life is too precious to waste and I refuse to waste another moment.  God is changing me.  I'm not the same woman I was 7 yrs ago.  I hope that through everything, my life reflects more of the hope of Jesus Christ and that He shines so brightly in it.  There's still a long way to go, but I hope my life is a sweet aroma to Him, though, it is wrought with many mistakes along the way.