The area of submission, where a wife submits to a husband in the American society seems foreign. Yes, that may happen in some cultures quite readily, but it seems like the word "submission" is a taboo word in my culture. The fact is, most of us DO submit to many things. We submit to the laws of the land, to traffic laws, to school administrators in school, to our bosses at work, to all sorts of people. Yet, the fact of wives submitting to their husbands seem like an assault on us as women.
In my first two marriages, I pretty much did NOT submit to my husbands. I lead both marriages and really was the dominant person. There were things I was afraid of or didn't dare cross with my 2nd husband, so, in a sense, I did submit to him in those areas - well, it was more the case of being afraid to go in these areas with him.
Now, being remarried a third time, God has really been doing a number on me. I began to do something similar to not submit and really wanting my own way. Yet, that has created a lot of conflicts and tension. In any organization, team, etc., it is most effective to have one leader. That leader, if he's a good leader, will enlist the inputs of those he leads and in a sense, they help the leader.
I believe that it's supposed to be similar in a marriage - one leader and the leader is to regard and esteem whom is submitted to him, like working as a team. When I finally realized that I was to submit and do it willingly, I tell you, God has really been bringing greater peace and joy in our marriage. We haven't been married THAT long, but I can see what God is doing.
God has really been blessing our marriage in so many areas, as well as our family. Things that we could not do or get past, we are now able to do in a short amount of time. It seemed for a long time I was spinning my wheels, wanting to do it my way. God did not intend for me to lead in marriage and since I have relinquished that, I feel this amazing weight lifting off me that I always had in my prior to marriages.
Wow! God brought me this amazing man who crossed oceans and continents to get to me. He gave up everything to be with me and we are beginning our lives anew together, raising our family as a team. I so love talking with him, working with him, doing so much with him. He is an incredible guy, keeps me accountable with my relationship with God, calls me to be a better person.
Our family is changing, growing, getting better. He is a really good father and I am seeing the improvements and blessings that are transferring to the kids.
God needed me to submit to Him, which He has been doing in me the past few years so that He could make me ready for my husband. And, together we can team up to raise the children He has entrusted to us.
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